Long before there were children to appease, my friend Jeni and I (with our husbands in tow) went out for dinner. It was late and we were hungry so we stopped at this Mexican place on Bluebonnet to give it a try.
We waited at the front a while and when no one came to seat us we just sat down at a table. After a long period of time, a server came up and asked us if we wanted anything to drink. Everyone went around the table and said what they wanted; Jeni asked for a Diet Coke, Troy and Aaron for a glass of water and I asked for a Virgin Strawberry Daiquiri.
Well this guy was absolutely perplexed as to why I would want a drink without alcohol. He would not give it up. "Are you sure you don't want the alchohol in it?" he asked looking at me askance like 'what are you smoking?' He seriously asked me this several times and finally got it that I. Did. Not. Want. Liquor. In. It. Thankyouverymuch.
He disappeared after that for a good long while only to reappear and give us menus briefly and then he took off to the back to hide some more. When he came back, we ordered our food. Jeni wasn't all that hungry so she just wanted a few things al a carte. After ordering, we sat and waited.
And waited.
And waited.
Until we were seriously close to just paying for our drinks (now empty and waiting to be refilled) and getting the heck out of there.
FINALLY... the man brought our food out to us, only he made Jeni's a la carte items a full meal. So what should have only costed a few dollars for a late night snack suddenly turned into a $20 fiasco. Now that may not seem like a lot of money but at the time Troy and Aaron and Jeni were all students and we were living in Married Student Housing alongside the cockroaches and just three streets away from the hairy scary side of town. We sat there stunned at the horrible service we had just been rendered and now here was the check and we were expected to pay for this doofus's mistake.
"Don't tip him." I implored Troy in a soft whisper. "He didn't earn it."
Aaron and Jeni were pouring over their portion of the bill and trying to decide what (if any) to tip too. Everyone left miniscule offerings on the table and we all shuffled out without a backward glance. I think that the server tried to call out, "Thanks, come again!" but the door slammed behind us mid sentence.
Sometime in January, I read a book called, 'Waiter Rant' by someone who works in the service industry and who tells tales of horrible customers and true stories about what the kitchen does to the food of these crappy patrons. He also outlines a few do's and don'ts when eating out.
For instance, he says that if the service was good, you should tip at least 30%.
30%!
Troy and I just laughed over that one.
He also says that if you don't have the money to properly tip, then you don't have the money to eat out.
Excuse me?!
When did tipping become a given? Why is automatically expected?
When my Mom and I went to France with some students and my teacher from French Class my freshman year in High School, the people who brought up room service would wait at the door (rather smuggly) for a tip. It would irritate me to no end! There were times that they were downright rude and huffy but you can be sure that they would take up the whole doorway and just stand there staring you down until you pressed some money into the palm of their hand.
And it's not only in the restaurant or hotel business either!
Whenever I go and get my hair done, I tip 15% because I always feel like they are going to mess up my hair or chop it into strings the next time I come if I don't tip accordingly. Troy says it's too much. I feel like it's too much too but I go into a panic everytime they are hovering over me while I'm calculating on my fingertips or on my cell phone calculator.
But there are also times that I am perfectly ok with NOT tipping. Like that time at the Mexican place with Aaron and Jeni (luckily, Troy took care of the check and gave him a tip; even if it was subpar). I know that servers don't make much and it is the tips that help them boost their paychecks, but then I feel like they need to work for it and give good service in order to earn it!
So what do you think about tipping?
How much is too much?
Do you tip a certain amount each time regardless of the service?
Have you ever not tipped? Why?
9 comments:
Brad always tips over 20%, which drives me crazy at the moment he's doing it, but then I remind myself that I would much rather be married to a big tipper than a cheap skate. Occasionally, I try to pay the bill while he's in the bathroom and then I can leave what I feel is appropriate :). We do tip a lot more if the bill is really small. However, I never tip at TCBY. I tip about 10-15% to my stylist, but then I wonder what to tip the assistant (shampooer) if there is one. It's so confusing!
BC (before children) Bart and I ate out...A LOT. We would tip what in my mind was the "minimum" 15% when at a nice place (think Ninfa's, Cheesecake Bistro, not Ruth Chris)...and as much as we could at regular places (think Bennigans, Chilis, etc)
One time a schoolmate of Bart's was our waiter at Cracker Barrel. He said his wife had just had twins and he was working doubles to cover her not working. Well, come to find out, his wife had been our waitress at CB not three weeks before...we tipped him more then our meal...but we were able and we paid at the cash register so he never knew. We were able, too...we both worked full time (I was preggos and teaching).
Now, however, I do about 15% or 20% (b/c it's easier to calculate) and never look back.
There was one place here in Omaha that was so awful that I felt they did not earn a tip (I mean, if you are working for $, then you need to earn it) and left w/o adding any in. I made sure to check my bank account to make sure they did not add their own...That is a fear of mine, adding a 1 in front of a 5 or something.
Oh, yeah, Maren...we posted at the same time and you reminded me...coffee bisto folks, mall food courts, etc. DRIVE ME BONKERS with their cups begging for tips. Lay off it...you are earning minimum wage, more then a waiter, so you aren't getting ANY of my money.
I hate going to Sonic. Why did these people earn a tip? Because they walked the food that I paid for a few steps out the door to my car?
I am a pretty good tipper at restaurants where there is a waiteress/waiter--but I never tip at cafes or such where I stand in line to get my food. I also don't tip at any fast food places. I always tip my hairdresser. I always tip the person who does my pedicures (I just go to one of those inexpensive nail places). My biggest problem with tipping is that we have to do it by percentage. Why should I leave a 20% tip at a place like Ruth's Chris when I got bad service (like we did last Christmas in Hawaii). I mean that would have been close to a $30 tip--I think I did more like $15. On the other hand sometimes I feel like I should tip more than 20% at some of the lesser expensive restaurants where our total bill is more like $15-$20 thus a 20% tip would only be $3-$4 because the service was excellent.
I'm with you about hotels though--I can carry my own luggage thank you, and maid service should be included in the cost--I shouldn't have to tip for it.
I waited tables for 4 years of my life, so I have a soft spot in my heart for servers. It is a STRESSFUL job. I still have nightmares sometimes that I have all sorts of tables and I can't move fast enough and they're all getting angry. I always tip 20% unless they gave really poor service, then I tip 15%. I tip hairdressers 20%. I'll tip Sonic workers if I have cash or quarters on me (which is rare). If I order something to go from a restaurant, I tip $1. I don't tip in those cups on counters. That's just people being silly looking for a way to make extra cash. There was one time Josh and I went to Applebees and sat for at least 30 minutes and no one even greeted us. We just got up, handed the menus back to the hostess, and left. I can't remember ever leaving no tip at all. I just feel too bad for those poor people. It's a tiring, backbreaking job, and you're dealing with hungry people. Not pleasant.
I'm with Stacy, I waited tables for a few years, too. I have also had bad dreams about waiting tables. It is a hard job, and they get paid peanuts hourly; I think that my hourly rate was $2.15. I don't feel bad about leaving no tip or a small tip if the service was aweful, because something can always be done or said (free dessert or something). The Mexican restaurant guy wouldn't gotten stiffed from us, too.
I think that cups or jars on the counter are tacky, and never put tips in those.
Ha!!! I remember that. I haven't set foot in that place since that night. I think we ended up tipping him 30 cents! He just had a bad attitude and was rude. And stupid.
Usually we tip 15%. If service is really good, or if I feel "inspired" to leave more 20 percent. Haircuts, always 5 bucks regarless of percentage (they get to keep all the money from the cut...they're not like waiters).
Good times, good times.
Oh and tips at Sonic? Never! I always use my debit card and there is never a spot on there for a "tip" so I figure they aren't expecting one. The only time I'd tip at Sonic is if they served me on roller-skates...that's tip worthy.
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